"On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.

This was the scene of ten years ago.

The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid,I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were steadily increasing, the affections between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school.

Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.
Dew came into my life.

It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her.

Dew said," You are the kind of man who best draws girls eyeballs". Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we just married, my wife said, "Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls". Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife. But I couldn t help doing so.
I moved Dew's hand aside and said,"You go to select some furniture,O.K.? I've got something to do in the company". Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised her to go and see with her. At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me.

However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt. Honestly,she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was sitting together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew’s body. This was the means of my entertainment.
One day I said to her in a slight joking way, "suppose we divorce, what will you do?" She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn t imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.

When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking with her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.Once again, Dew said to me, "He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together." I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.
When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. "I've got something to tell you" I said.She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.Suddenly I didn t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want to divorce. I raised a serious topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be much annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly "why?" I'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer turned her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, "you are not a man!"
At that night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart. The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said.

Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer.
A late night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fell asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.

She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me,but I was supposed to give her one months time before divorce, and in the month's time we must live as normal life as possible. Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and shedidn t want him to see our marriage was broken.
She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me,"He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day?"

This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me.I nodded and said,"I remembered" . "You carried me in your arms, so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning."
I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage with a romantic form.

I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out for the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, "daddy is holding mummy in his arms!". His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, "Let us start from today, don't tell our son". I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for bus, I drove to office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn t looked at this intimate woman carefully for along time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face.
On the third day, she whispered to me, "the outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there".

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vaguer.

On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger.

I didn't tell Dew about this.
I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now.
She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, All mydresses have grown fatter. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head.

Our son came in at the moment. "Dad, it s time to carry mum out"
. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.
On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step.Our son had gone to school. She said, "actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old."

I held her tightly and said, "both you and I didn't notice that our life was lack of such intimacy."

I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, "Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious."

She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. "You got no fever.' I moved her hand off my head. "Sorry, Dew, I can only say sorry to you, I won t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her into our home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you."

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into cry. I walked downstairs and drove to the office.When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me to write the greeting words on the card. I smiled and wrote, "I'll carry you out every morning until we are old."


____________________________________________________________________
A perfect story for me.
Its the love that touched me.
The love that is everlasting.
I wish someone will be there for me everyday.
Im waiting.
____________________________________________________________________
Finally watched 'money not enough' with yihan
funny,touching,very emotional movie..

somehow, someone's shadow is still loitering in my mind.

alrights, i fell aslp in bio com lab..
-.- im supposed to do my evaluation for this sem..
im done with it, so i tried to log into facebook..
the com damn lag can!! tats why i fell aslp..

im like a zoobie now can..
sobs.woke up so damn early this morning..
had a headache since then,
worse, i had to queue for 969 for 20 mins?
the queue super long can, but then i saw this auntie who literally CUT queue & got into the bus, & she got a seat too!
dont she noe tat she had to queue? or does she hav any abnormalities tat she had to cut queue..
woke up at 6am, with only 4 hours of real sleep..
after RM presentaion, we managed to tell ms chia tat we had to leave for lect,
tabao-ed mac den went the the sch busstop to eat..
im like a zoobie now can..luckily i managed to catch 30 mins of slp in the library until the 2 lecturers or whatever came to tell us of "no food allowed in the library" & tat im not supposed to sleep on the chair..blah blah blah..
she told me to lie down on the table if i wan to slp..
so does tat mean i lie supine on the top of the table?!
whatever it is, i cant get back to slp,
so went round the library, managed to get this fruit juice book,
can make nutritional fruit juice for ah ma liao((:

i had pharm meeting & stats meeting.
OMG lah..zoombie zoombie zoombie..

finally all presentation's over,
other than entrepreneur thingy.. -.-
& my psychology test tmr! wtf.im clueless about this module can..
hope i can scrape through..

meeting up with ade they all at WS ((:
it'll be the last time we'll be seeing ernest until he come out from ns?
time really pass fast, luqman's in & now ernest..
when will the rest be going ns too?

got to leave for WS now, before im late!

it's raining now.& raining days are loved.by wendy!!
LOL.yupps.im in sch now.& it rained..
at 9am, mum woke me up by asking me what time is my lesson..
it's at 9!! & i was still at home..
alright.im feeling slighty feverish today.tgt with throat discomfort..
mummy wanted to drive me to sch...
but fidah called while i was preparing to leave..
PHARMACO LECT CANCELLED!! Slack at home, talk rubbish to sis den left at 10am
reached sch at 11am.tapped for both psycho's lect.trying to practice stats since..
but the temptation of playing facebook is too...you know..
yupps..did really practiced..with the help of fidah..
& this china guy..i forgot his name..but thanks to him anw..he really helped me alot ((:
Ah! i wanna go see doc liao..but i lazy la..later also dunno give me what medicines only..
hmmm..going sgh to visit grandma in the evening..
she really looked so sick, poor thing.
sigh..if only my grandmother(mother's mother) is still alive..
im going home to sleep!!

2nd last day of sch before exams
& yupp..i skipped my HS 2124 so im now in elp trying to read up more about stress management for my presentatin at 4pm
my notes & research & whatever is placed infront of the pc BUT i spilled my water!
whatever lah..

anyway..been lazy to blog this few days...i used the com mainly for mapling..hahas
so..i shant say bout the last last sunday or monday or tuesday..I DONT RMB ANYTHING..LOL
shall say bout wednesday..
i skipped my morning lab but waited for my meeting at 1115...
after the meeting, took train with weijie, alighted at woodlands..
it's been very long since i've chatted lots with weijie..
from pri sch to sec sch to his LOVE LIFE!!!
shant say much..HAHAS..
i bused to rp, reached at bout 1330..
read my i-weekly magazine & munching chips & sour plum to kill time..
waited till 3 plus when yihan came out..acc me for awhile..
he left at bout 1615? & yea..huiqun came out at 1645!
VERY VERY VERY long din get to meet her :D
we went clarke quay for dinner..
after tat sat down at some place with very nice ambience..chit chat..
9 plus went by the river side comtinue to chat.LOL
she was surprised tat i've grown up emotionally & stuffs..
she too..was maturing alot..
maybe what we have gone through made us what we are now..
& im meeting her again tmr? ((:

im gonna catch a movie with yihan later on at night..
hopefully i wun pangsei him last min lah :P

got to meet faridah & syahidah at north now...
presentation at 1600!!!

im bored to death at home..
helped mummy packed some tidbits for her sch's nationalday celebration
will upload pics in near future..

i wanna go out
i wanna watch movie
will someone or anyone ask me out?
its been long since ive watched movie
ASK ME OUT FOR MOVIES BEFORE I ROT AT HOME
oh..i need to prepare my upcoming and the last presentation..
i'll need to study for my exams too
but nevertheless..i need a break
so will some kind souls please ask me out for movies?
i'll be super lazy to watch it alone or ask ple out to watch lah..

sighs..i thought of someone many times today..

im like a hungry ghost today..OPPSSS...
anw.i keep feeling hungry today..
i ate my breakfast within mins.incredible fast for me on a sat morning..
next im finding food again after my nap of 3 hours, i only ate milo and about 10 pieces of biscuit?
mummy tabao back food from my dad's god-sis place..
1 big pack of fried rice, whice is extremly yummy, red-coloured agg, some chicken wings, some chicken drumsticks eaten by sheree alrdy and duck's drumstick..
din finish all lah..but the amt i ate was enough to feed both my sis
when both of them can eat about 3 times more than me...LOL

gonna start to tidy my table NOW >.<

but im stucked infront of the tv
dere's tis channel U show of a magician..he's on Jackie Wu's show lah..
his magic is SO amazing..
but time really passs so fast..
it seems tat we only watch tat show a couple of days ago..
o.O

i wanna drink coke light again..
hmmm..gonna call sis and xianghong..meeting them for supper later?

ive been trying to install maple but i dont know whats wrong with the com,it just wont let me play..
anw im stoning at home today
with the intention to tidy my room later..
its far too messy, can be compared with a rubbish chute

yea.im gonna cut off my phone line anytime this month
with my outstanding phone bills, and some perverts keep miss-calling me, and..my phone have not rang since dunno when, except for some friends.haiis

ANYWAY...
went for sushi dinner ytd night..
i called up the restaurant for a reservation..
will upload the pics once i get hold of my sis's cam :D

yea i skipped my night class should have went..but im too tired..
met boon wai, bused home..
he picked this specs up from somewhere n i wore it

i look so nerdy right? LOL


just a random pic.hahas

i cant play maple
so im super bored now
yea..im home since 2 plus?..n rotting in front of this bloody com
i wanna play maple..but dunno whats wrong with this com

went for 2 hours adult nursing lect..
i did listen attentively to the lect..but somehow erlina's mp3 caught my attention

see how cute is this mickey-shaped mp3
1 whole JAY's album is inside :D

i just finished pharmacology's presentation today
so ive 1 load off my shoulder..
the next n the last would be medical social..
just hope all goes well for tat..

IT'S NURSES DAY TODAY
HAPPY NURSES DAY :D

here are some pics i found in nina's blog
i forgot those pics we took during clinical..
anw..nice slideshow in her blog
http://oh-firnanninasara.blogspot.com/


during our yr 1 attachment in CGH


with mdm asma in CGH-she's the best CI :D


Yr 2 clinicalin KKH with Sister Koh :D